Often we think that the other person makes us trust or not trust them. However, trust is a choice. It depends on us not them. The other person may act in ways that make us question if trust is a good choice. Yet, it is still our choice to trust them or not.
This leads to the question of our default trust stance. When we encounter someone new, do we mistrust them until they prove themselves trustworthy, or do we trust them until they prove themselves unworthy of our trust?
This makes a difference becuase it influences to what we are willing to expose ourself. If we are generally a mistrusting person. We will limit the experiences we are willing to have. Some examples include:
- the books we are willing to read
- the products we are willing to try
- the people with whom we are willing to associate
If we hold a stance of mistrust, we will wrap ourselves in a protective bubble and expose ourselves only to things that are familiar and comfortable. So, we also limit our exposure to ideas.
While not trusting keeps us safe, it limits our ability to pursue our calling. It assumes we have the best ideas, which we probably don’t. It assumes that we already know the best people to help us, which we probably don’t. It assumes that we already have the best resources to fullfill our calling, which we probably don’t.
On the otherhand, if we hold a stance of trust, we will connect with more people, be exposed to more ideas, and discover more resources. Sure, we’ll probably be let down more frequently. We’ll find things that aren’t helpfull and we’ll spend money on things that don’t work.
In the end, we’ll be more effective living our calling when we take a stance of trust and allow more into our lives.
For me personally, I’m working to shift from a stance of mistrust to one of trust. I’m sure I still have a ways to go, but I can tell I’m more open than I used to be.
What about you? Do you generally hold a stance of trust or mistrust?
