I’ve had this inner dialog. I think it’s not all that unique. I goes something like this. To increase the impact that I’m making in the world, I probably could do _______. And in the blank I put in this small incremental change that I’m pretty comfortable making. I’ve recently been challenged to stop this.
The truth behind this “probably could do” plan is that it’s small changes. And at the next step, I make another small change, and so forth. I see a lot of my friends call this type of change “big growth.” But I’m being challenged to see this as really small.
If we make 4 small personal incremental changes a year (which seems to be about what I observe growing people making), we’re not going to be making big shifts, and our impact in the world will be severely limited. And in truth, it’s why we have so many dang problems in the world. We do what’s comfortable, but not what’s necessary to cause deep transformation. We address symptoms and leave root causes untouched.
It’s like this: suppose you’re driving a car and to get where you want to go, you need to take a hard 90 degree right turn. Making small incremental 5 degree turns isn’t going to get you there. By the time you’re finally going in the right direction, you’re nowhere near the road you’re supposed to be on.
The small incremental change keeps us in the safe zone, but the big results we are destined to create aren’t in this zone. Suppose, I wanted to send 50 kids to college. Let’s say that’s what I’m passionate about. I can see the huge transformation this would make on entire family trees for people who otherwise wouldn’t go. That would be a pretty worthy goal.
If I ask, “what’s probable?”, here are the things I’m likely to come up with:
- I know I can probably save $100 per month. Let me see, that will take me 10 years to send a kid to a few semesters of college.
- Maybe I can work really hard and send 2 kids to college by saving $500, month.
- Probably, I won’t send even one kid to college. Who am I kidding? I can’t do this.
This type of thinking isn’t going to work. I need to think different or I’m going to be stuck with small results. Let’s say I ask, “What’s possible?” And Instead of asking “Can I?,” I ask, “How can I?” Here’s what I might come up with instead:
- To send 50 kids to college, I’m going to need a lot of money – way more than my current income, so I need other people to help. I can ask people to donate and/or partner with me.
- To send 50 kids to college, they will need to be prepared to engage with training at the college level, so these kids may need a lot of mentoring and coaching. I will need to coach the kids or have other mentors to prepare them to do the work.
- These kids will need to be accepted to college, so I probably need to start working with them in middle school and through high school.
- …
I’m passing on the challenge I’ve been given. Are you asking, “What’s probable”, or are you asking, “What’s possible?” Are you asking, “Can I?”, or are you asking “How can I?” Are you staying in the safe zone, or are you venturing outside the safe zone and taking some risks for big results? Are you ready to step out?
