I encounter people from time to time who say something like, “I don’t worry about other people. I let them make their own choices.” Basically these folks are saying, “I don’t give a rip about other people. I live my life and I let them live theirs.”
My Experience
I used to live by this philosophy. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. This is what it’s like to live with this philosophy:
When I don’t give a rip about other people, my choices and my actions are all about me and what I want. I don’t consider how I may be affecting other people. Other people often experience me as an egotistical, self centered, prick who doesn’t care.
Other people do things that interfere with what I want. So I become frustrated and angry with people. They should be like me and not give a rip about what I’m choosing. I think thoughts like, “if people would just leave me alone, things would be good.” I treat other people like objects, obstacles in the way. I blame other people for my problems.
Life this way is incredibly lonely. I don’t give a rip about other people, so they in response don’t give a rip about me. I don’t have deep relationships. Existing relationships feel strained. I can’t trust people as they are the source of my problems. And other people don’t open up and share with me either.
However, deep down its all a lie. Saying that I don’t care about other people really is just a protective shell. I tell myself that if I keep people at arms length and I avoid caring, then I won’t get hurt.
Living this way is a lonely, empty, hollow, experience. There’s no connection. There’s no meaning. There’s no purpose. And almost no one will miss you when you’re gone. Basically, going through life not caring about people really sucks.
I’m really glad I don’t live like this anymore.
Your Impact
If you can relate to any of this, you have a choice. You can continue to experience a hollow life, or you can decide to care, connect, and value other people. Because, to make an impact in the world, be significant, and live with meaning, you have to give a rip. I doesn’t work any other way.
It comes down to a choice. What will you choose?
